NET-A-PORTER Limited
 

NET-A-PORTER Limited

One of the better perks of the job is getting sneak peeks at the upcoming season's accessories. A girl has to make her shopping list, after all. Today—as part of "Market," or the two weeks of back-to-back appointments filled with shoes, bags, clothes and sunglasses—I headed over to Coach to see what would be in store.

For Fall, the brand is returning to its roots and going for a heritage theme. Think classic Coach pieces but with more luxe detailing like embossed leather that looks like croc or ostrich. I've never been a fan of ostrich—ever—but the aubergine embossed leather (or faux ostrich) on the Kristin Spectator Flap Satchel ($458) is subtle and pretty. Consider me converted. The hardware detailing is key for Coach this season, with handles, buckles and chains galore. It adds a nice bit of luxury.

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model falling down

It starts with a wobble, then a twist of the knee and ankle. And then—boom!—skin hits catwalk. Cue gasps, sympathetic applause, and countless ruthless photos and tweets.

Today’s models may not be less coordinated than their predecessors, but they are more vulnerable to the whims of a plugged-in, high-surveillance society in which once-private fashion shows are live streamed around the world, front-rowers are armed with iPhones and Twitter feeds, and any ignominious moment is destined to have thousands of hits on YouTube the next day.

Take the Fall/Winter 2011 collections, for instance. This season’s shows have given us gleeful reports of face-plants at Christian Siriano and Nicholas K., and a near-collision between Coco Rocha and Lindsay Wixson at Jean Paul Gaultier. At Nicola Formichetti’s first Mugler womenswear show, models struggled to keep their balance as they weaved in and out of columns, and even guest star Lady Gaga—no stranger to sky-high stilts herself—was spied nervously asking for walking tips backstage, despite reportedly demanding higher heels.

It's understandable to feel unsteady when you've got a pair of oversize 9-inch heels strapped to your feet and a slick, slippery runway to cover. So why aren't people understanding when a model takes a misstep and plops down? Are we just cruel and heartless?

Not exactly.

Chalk it up to sartorial Schadenfreude. Even though we know the pressure is high and the heels are treacherous, we seem to greet runway roadkill with the same enthusiasm as a Charlie Sheen meltdown or a "Stars Without Their Makeup" photo spread. Sure, we don't have the million-dollar paycheck, tiny waist, or pair of "goddess" girlfriends, but we can all see some idolized figure fall from grace (literally) and feel a bit better about ourselves. It's our license to feel smug.

If the 20th century was all about keeping up appearances and controlling images, the 21st is about exposing the cracks. A few decades ago a clumsy model would have been a scandal; today it's just further proof that these gals aren't as perfect as the industry and media sets them up to be. Except for Gisele. That woman can do no wrong.

So, sorry, ladies. You'll just have to watch your step and grip those toes a little tighter. Or don't, actually—we could use the confidence boost.

Photo: A model loses her footing.

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Halle Berry 2011 Oscars

Greetings, readers! The Chicks are weighing in on the 2011 Oscars from both coasts. On the West, we have Bettina, watching from the comfort of a living room in Bel Air; on the East, Susan watching from the comfort of the family room on Park Ave. Two "upscale" Ethnic Chicks talkin' about the Academy Awards, but let's face it: The closest they got to Kodak was an Instamatic camera.

Bettina: I really liked this year's show. I thought the combination of James Franco and Anne Hathaway was much better than any host of recent memory. I loved the opening monologue being turned into a film. And there was the added bonus of Anne Hathaway's costume changes.

Susan: Agreed. When was the last time this broadcast ended prior to midnight? The Ethnic Chicks need their beauty sleep. But let's cut to the chase: Fashion winners and losers, or runners-up, to be kind. For me, the best look of the night was a tie between Annette Bening and Helen Mirren. Both elegant, sleek, and completely individual.

Bettina: To me, it was Jennifer Hudson, hands down, because I feel that she would inspire a lot of people. She looked so slim, confident and feminine, such a huge change (no pun intended) from the first time she was at the Oscar podium. I also loved Halle Berry. She looked like a princess. To me, that was the tie.

Susan: I do have to give it up to the sistahs. They looked gorgeous. I also must note it was a little sad that other than those two, and the clip of Lena Horne, the only color on that stage came from the outfits.

Bettina: There was a lot of diversity—in the dress shapes. Including that hideous Vegas wedding dress on Nicole Kidman.

Susan: Not my favorite look of hers, and what was with the red shoes? Was she going to dance to her death? That was the premise of Black Swan.

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